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Blogathon for Tricia, Hour Five: Oh dear

January 9th, 2010 (08:24 am)

Hey, guys! You know what's awesome? Hitting a wall at hour five of your twenty-hour blogathon! I mean this is SO FANTASTIC! You've all got to try it!

Only not. At all.

Here's the thing, y'all. I didn't prewrite any of these entries. This is not because I am a particularly moral person, mind you. It is because I am a particularly procrastinatory person. Going into this I thought I would prewrite maybe three or four of the entries, so I could take a nap if need be. I imagined need would probably be. Lack of sleep and I don't coexist very well.

However, I did not prewrite anything. I could tell you that it's because I was working hard on the Beth book all week, and that would be kind of true. I could tell you that it's because I was working hard harvesting cartoon peas in FarmVille and genetically engineering cartoon fish in FishWorld, and that would also be kind of true. I could tell you that it's because I am deeply committed to the most sacred principles of the blogathon, but that would really not be very true at all. And of course, the wider truth is that I just didn't get around to it. Of virtue I have little, but my cup runneth over with excuses.

So, uh. I told you about my first novel and I told you about my pills. I wrote a crackfic that everyone will laugh at and I wrote a heartfelt but entirely uninspiring introduction to the whole shebang.

What in the hell comes next?

Man, I wasn't going to do this. I so wasn't going to do this. I was going to bring my A-game! Every entry I wrote was going to be witty and entertaining and polished for public consumption! And right now I am writing about how I don't know what to write right now, and I just got confused as to which right was spelled write and which was spelled right. (But I still know how to spell chiasmus. So everybody has to go look up chiasmus if you don't already know about it, because amid all those rights and writes I got some chiasmus going on. If I can't be witty, I can use rhetorical devices from tenth-grade Latin class.)

All right. Here's what we're doing here, folks.

I have some topics jotted down for posts throughout the day, but now is not a good time to utilize any of them. For one thing I can't think straight enough to pull them off at the moment, and for another no one is awake right now anyway.

So I'm phoning it in.

Yup. I am reneging on everything I promised and I am disappointing myself to no end. I am ending this post here -- yes, this aimless, pointless, content-less atrocity of a post -- and I am taking a catnap, then a walk. Sure, I've got like a half an hour to do both of those things. Whatever. The point is it's either do something to fix this rapidly fizzling heap of synapses that used to be a quasi-functioning brain, or keep on writing progressively incoherent/incomprehensible shit for the next fifteen hours.

So. Here you have 600ish words of pure lose. I don't even think it's a fail. Fail implies something entertaining, like you might find on FailBlog. This is not a fail blog. It's just lose.

If you would like something entertaining, I suggest that you back slowly away from the Hour Five blogathon and head to icanhascheezburger without delay.

Well, hopefully you all obeyed the LJ-cut instructions anyway.

This is the hour five post of my blogathon for my aunt Tricia, who is dying of end-stage ovarian cancer and whose family is being hit with a whole lot of bills that they can't afford alone as a result. Donations can be made at the link given above. A number of topics are still unclaimed and can be bought for $5 or more.