Log in

No account? Create an account
the girl with violets in her lap [userpic]

May 15th, 2010 (09:15 pm)

I started this as notes on what I wanted to write about and wound up just writing as I went, so I'm just pasting the notes for starters. Off we go!

-Karen, there is seriously something wrong with your Sim. I mean. Wrong. I came back into the game and you were still sitting there on the ground talking about crossed-out steamboats to nobody, so I saw Will walking by and went, okay, well, here's *someone* for her to talk to even if it's not Idina. So I had you invite Will to hang out, which you still thought you were doing with Idina, so it was like inviting him into a three-person conversation only there would only be two of you. I was curious as to whether he'd ever direct comments to the air, too. So he sat down, and then immediately got up. I don't even think his legs folded all the way before he stretched them out again and walked away. "I like your makeup," you called after him, but whether it was a snark or a sincere gesture of friendship I just do not know. And now there you are sitting alone on the ground again, Karen, telling the empty evening all about postal scales.

-I think maybe Santana has webbed fingers or something, because she won't hold hands, ever. She'll do everything else, but she won't hold hands. It's sort of like Julia Roberts with kissing in Pretty Woman, but a good deal less logical. But as long as Brittany doesn't try to hold her hand the two of them get along famously, and just now thanks to them I found the cutest new option ever:

Cuddle under stars. I fall.

Meanwhile, Karen, you tried briefly to talk to Alan-Rachel's-Dad-1, but he was too busy juggling glasses off the bar to talk to you:

He had been doing that for hours and would not stop, so you decided to talk to Rachel, who was in the bathroom. Luckily she was just flushing when you got there. And she seemed not to mind you barging in on her, so you guys stood around for awhile talking about Rachel's desire to go to the big city and be on stage (no lie: the speech bubbles went "city", "suitcase", "podium", and "stage"). When you changed the subject to construction workers, though, Rachel got bored and started smacking you. This made me very nervous for the half a second it took me to realize that she was starting a game of Red Hands. So then you played Red Hands in the bathroom, and now you're friends with an 81% relationship meter, and whenever you go somewhere, Karen, Rachel follows you and tries to start a game of Rock Paper Scissors, Kicky Bag, whatever. Luckily you like Rock Paper Scissors:

"Urh, urh, nerk!" is Simlish for one, two, shoot:

Karen wins a round

The joy of victory, the agony of defeat. I like Rachel's expression.

(Breaking news: Rachel just said "urh, urh, apper!" instead of "nerk"! I do not know what this means but I will certainly keep you informed! Oh, the mystery, oh, the suspense!)

So anyway, with y'all absorbed in Rock Paper Scissors, and Alan still absorbed in juggling glasses, and Redac upstairs absorbed in becoming actually a very good ballet dancer, albeit in a remarkably stupid outfit --

-- I thought I would get back to Santana and Brittany, who had been stargazing for quite some time and whose chemistry had steadily been rising, but who hadn't been making any actual moves on each other because Sims generally don't without outside intervention, especially same-sex Sims. Checking in on them, I discovered that both of them had a top aspiration of "Very First Kiss". This is an awesome thing is you can get it to happen because their aspiration fulfillment goes through the ceiling, but dreadful if someone rejects it because then the other person's aspiration goes through the floor and the therapist who turns you into a chicken shows up. And with Santana blowing hot and cold all over the place, I was a little uneasy about trying anything, honestly. But after a few more minutes of supervised flirting, I decided to go for it. And hey! Wow! Romantic music! Shy smiles! False starts! Giggles! And then they joined lips and floated up into the air:

Such is a first kiss in Simland. Aww.

As it turns out, a second kiss does not go nearly as well. In fact, immediately following all the floating and the hearts and the shimmery light from above and the swoony noises and whatnot, Brittany resettled on the ground and had the understandable thought that it would be nice to caress Santana's hair. Immediately the cold front blew in, and Santana made sharp noises in Simlish and threw her hand off and stalked away:

Way in the background, that stupid guy is still juggling cups at the bar

This seemed a little bitchy since she'd just gotten a 10,000 point aspiration kick from kissing Brittany. Of course, that aspiration had now been replaced:

So I think the point is that Santana is a user and a mercenary bitch. Canon! Also, I think she has been going to too many drinking parties, because as you can see below with the crossed-out bed, one of her top fears is of passing out. More canon!

But her aspiration kick was useful, anyway, in that it allowed me to get the ecstasy hat for their household. For those of you who haven't been around since my last Sims obsession period (and who thus haven't understood this icon I keep using), I should explain that the ecstasy hat is a hat that you can get when your aspiration points hit a certain level. It is technically called the Noodlesoother, and is appropriately silly-looking. It boosts your serotonin levels -- not sure how, I think maybe through your ears -- and "produces feelings of euphoria and contentment". So this is why I call it the ecstasy hat. I got it and then I saw Karen lounging on the couch and looking a little depressed, maybe because people keep getting up and walking away when she tries to talk to them about postal scales or spatulas, so I decided that she should wear it for awhile:

Then I remembered that there are special sunglasses that cure social ineptitude, which was even more to the point, so yay! But when I tried to get them I realized that Santana didn't have enough aspiration points left to buy them and Brittany was *just* shy of having enough. Because Santana had rejected her caress. Karen, did you ever think that you would be doomed to social inadequacy because of relationship problems between Santana and Brittany on Glee? I bet you didn't.

Anyway, I decided to leave it off there for the night. I'll try to get you your glasses soon, Karen.*


*Everyone reading this entry who does not know IRL Karen should know: IRL Karen is NOT AT ALL like this. She is lovely and an awesome friend and great to be around, and unless I'm missing something she is not obsessed with postal scales or spatulas or the anti-steamboat movement or anything else. Her Simperson needs help though.


Posted by: lady of the summer, princess of the morning (diana_hawthorne)
Posted at: May 16th, 2010 01:53 am (UTC)
macbeth: laugh to scorn the power of man

I love your Sims saga! These are hilariousssssss!

Posted by: ems (ems)
Posted at: May 16th, 2010 01:18 pm (UTC)

Ahahaha. I am enjoying these so much, as always. :D

Posted by: Baby, I'm gonna do you till you can juggle. (shaysdays)
Posted at: May 16th, 2010 03:56 pm (UTC)
Dick in a box

Nono, I think that makes perfect sense as an aspiration- first, you smooch, then you want a place to get some serious smoochin' on.

Posted by: Damian (fanboy_of_zeus)
Posted at: May 16th, 2010 06:16 pm (UTC)

Yeah, teen Sims with romance on their mind always want to buy a sofa. If she'd been an adult it would've been a double bed she wanted. Or a hot tub, if she already had a bed.

Hair-stroking is another funny thing. I think it may require higher relationship stats than WooHoo, which is just plain weird. I've certainly had Sims who were willing to sleep together before they'd let the other caress them.

Posted by: Pirate Jenny (deliriums_fish)
Posted at: May 17th, 2010 09:44 pm (UTC)
moulin rouge


I just read a recap of "Laryngitis", and it contained this paragraph which I had to share with you.

I know that what I'm about to do will invite an avalanche of hate mail the likes of which I haven't seen since I said I didn't like Penn and Teller and I was denounced as an enemy of magic on some e-mail list for magician nerds. (And yes, I do know that "magician nerds" is redundant.) But still. I have spent the last several days listening to "Rose's Turn" as performed by some of the leading lights of Broadway and American music, and I think that what we saw on this show was one of the best ever. So, Ethel, Tyne, Betty, Bette -- you have just been schooled by a nineteen-year old boy in his first role ever. Patti, you held your own due to your utter and complete commitment to depicting the full depths of Mama Rose's insanity. And as for you, Bernadette I do not want to see your face right now. What did poor Mama Rose ever do to you that she deserved that kind of treatment? Okay, bring on the hate mail.

Poor Bernadette. She wasn't that bad.

Posted by: the girl with violets in her lap (slammerkinbabe)
Posted at: May 17th, 2010 10:41 pm (UTC)
!queer (dancing queen)

Okay, now that I am done rolling all over the floor and shit, I have to agree with you that Bernadette wasn't that bad. Not worse than Tyne fucking Daly for crying out loud.

Otherwise: ROTFLOLF*

*Is that the big exaggerated version of "LOL" or "LMAO" the new kids are saying? Rolling on the floor laughing out loud forever? I feel like I heard that somewhere. It is appropriate.

Edited at 2010-05-17 10:42 pm (UTC)

Posted by: Pirate Jenny (deliriums_fish)
Posted at: May 18th, 2010 06:34 am (UTC)

I have honestly never heart ROTFLOLF before. Though I kind of like it because it can be pronounced "Rot-flof".

I have to say that I think I'm biased because, in my mind, Bernadette can do no evil.

7 Read Comments