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the girl with violets in her lap [userpic]

March 26th, 2008 (03:34 pm)
amused

current mood: amused

Hahaha. You know, since I started wearing makeup and changing my personal style to be less femme and more... uh, I don't know what you'd call it -- eclectic? idiosyncratic? cracked-out? bizarre? -- guys have been hitting on me with some frequency. I noted it with astonishment the first time it happened and then kind of got used to it, though I'm still surprised that it is happening because my femme style of dress usually meant I went around wearing push-up bras and shirts that showed X-treem cleavage, and I would have figured that cleavage would trump makeup as far as guys' interest was concerned. Anyway, so I have come to assume that a.) guys are responding to my makeup rather than to anything else, and b.) that the area of the city where I work is full of guys, some scuzzy and some not *terribly* so, looking to pick up random girls.

This guy that I encountered in the 7/11 today, however, is my favorite so far:

GUY: Hey! Whoa! Hey!
KYLIE: half-turns, assuming at first that Guy is not so much trying to hit on her as trying to warn her of some danger ahead What?
GUY: Your NECKTIE.
KYLIE: ::is wearing a zebra-print necktie over a black T-shirt and jeans:: ...?
GUY: That's a hot necktie. I like it.
KYLIE: Oh. Thanks.
GUY: Like to pull it right off you!
KYLIE, internally: So I would be wearing nothing but... a T-shirt and jeans? And a jacket?
GUY: Rawr!
KYLIE: ::bursts out laughing, entirely without meaning to:: ::because seriously, rawr?::
GUY: Oh, hey, didn't mean to offend, didn't mean to offend. Sorry. I thought you might be up for that but maybe you're not up for that, didn't mean to offend.
KYLIE: You... you didn't? ::walks away::
GUY: What's your name?
KYLIE, selecting a Diet Coke: Alexis Makayla.
GUY: Hey, hey... ::clearly not remembering the name:: You. Chili and cheese dog. Hot dog with chili and cheese.
KYLIE, who has clearly been possessed by the devil: You like those, huh?
GUY: Na, I, na, I -- na! I'm gonna get you a hot dog with chili and cheese. Where it's at!
KYLIE: ... ::buys Diet Coke, gets the hell out of there::
GUY: ::when last seen through the window of the 7/11, was chomping into a hot dog::

Seriously, guys, any dude who decides that the best method of hitting on me is to proposition removal of my necktie and then make saucy* innuendoes about a 7/11 brand hot dog with chili and cheese is clearly a major, major catch.

And you know what? I don't even think he was drunk.

RAWR!

*Rimshot!

Comments

Posted by: Doc Manhattan (docmanhattan)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 08:02 pm (UTC)
teacher

You can't really pull a necktie off of someone; it's a slipknot. The fact that this guy doesn't know how a necktie works just adds to his winner-ness.

Posted by: the girl with violets in her lap (slammerkinbabe)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 09:36 pm (UTC)

I didn't get the impression that he wears them very often.

Posted by: azorbas11 (azorbas11)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 08:36 pm (UTC)

Ha ha now that was a terrific description. I can only imagine what it was like in person.

Posted by: Erbie McInQuack (erbie)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 08:46 pm (UTC)
wombat

Heh. Maybe I should start wearing neckties! Oh, wait...

Posted by: the girl with violets in her lap (slammerkinbabe)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 09:38 pm (UTC)

No, no, chili cheese dog guy is mine!

(Seriously, between the hot dog thing and the necktie fetish, you sort of wind up starting to wonder...)

(Deleted comment)
Posted by: the girl with violets in her lap (slammerkinbabe)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 09:36 pm (UTC)

I know, right? I am in love with this guy's charisma and sense of the romantic.

Posted by: Kare Bear (luvs_chicago)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 09:10 pm (UTC)
Chandler smiling

That's amazing, Alexis.

Posted by: the girl with violets in her lap (slammerkinbabe)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 09:37 pm (UTC)

RAWR

Posted by: Kare Bear (luvs_chicago)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 10:13 pm (UTC)
Bicurious

I'm mentally ripping that necktie off you right now, baby. *chucks a chili cheese dog at Alexis*

Posted by: Rebecca (theniwokesoftly)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 09:54 pm (UTC)

Fantastic!

Posted by: Katie (october31st)
Posted at: March 26th, 2008 10:38 pm (UTC)

I'm going to go out on this CRAZY limb here and suggest that maybe, just maybe, it's not stuff on your face or apparel propping up your bosomy area but, I don't know, confidence in being who you want to be, that is causing the attraction?

Crazy, I know ;)

Posted by: justsurvive (justsurvive)
Posted at: March 27th, 2008 12:28 am (UTC)

chili cheese dogs turn me on too. you cant blame a guy for that

Posted by: Pewter Wings (pewter_wings)
Posted at: March 27th, 2008 02:31 am (UTC)

These guys must somehow sense your marriage. Married people get hit on a lot.
With hot dogs. *snerk*

Posted by: Instruction-free poison (redsnake05)
Posted at: March 27th, 2008 03:12 am (UTC)

I definitely have to start wearing make-up and see if it works for me too. I have just cropped my hair, though, so I'm suspecting that uber-short hair trumps make-up and cleavage.

Posted by: Christine, the strawberry girl (thirtiesgirl)
Posted at: March 28th, 2008 12:07 am (UTC)

Dammit. I want some daft guy to hit on me by offering to buy me a 7-11 chili cheese dog. Not pulling off the necktie, though, as I don't wear them. Unless I decide to see Yazoo on their reunion tour or something.

...Which, now that I've written it, sounds all snarky, like "ooh, people who wear neckties are trying for some sort of new wave retro '80s fashion mod thing..." when I'm so not. If I was young enough and fashionable enough to pull off wearing a necktie, I so would. But alas, not for this old biddy. I guess I'll just have to use my...my...my imaginashuh-huuun....

Posted by: the girl with violets in her lap (slammerkinbabe)
Posted at: March 28th, 2008 12:33 am (UTC)

Heh, I'm not fashionable at all, and I didn't even know it *was* a retro '80s thing. I suppose it must be some sort of trend right now, and probably a goofy one, as I bought it at Claire's, an accessory store aimed at like 12-14-year-olds. But I just liked it. I also like fedoras and want to get one of those soon, and I have shiny silver suspenders and want to get a rainbow pair. I have no idea if I pull any of this off in the sense of looking fashionable or well put together, or whatever, but I know I enjoy wearing it, so that's why I do it. ::shrug:: I probably look like a doofus. LOL

Posted by: Point, Click, Repeat. (angrybuddha765)
Posted at: April 2nd, 2008 11:06 pm (UTC)

Hahahaha, people are funny...

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